1、2019/5/1,1,商务信函写作:案例分析,西南财经大学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,2,Case Study,2006年4月7日晚,EMC大中华区总裁陆纯初回办公室取东西,到门口才发现自己没带钥匙。此时他的私人秘书瑞贝卡已经下班。陆试图联系后者未果。数小时后,陆纯初还是难抑怒火,于是在凌晨1时13分通过内部电子邮件系统给瑞贝卡发了一封措辞严厉且语气生硬的“谴责信”,引发双方发生激烈争吵,导致秘书被迫离职。详情请见http:/ just told you not to assume or take things for granted on Tuesday and you locked m
2、e out of my office this evening when all my things are all still in the office because you assume I have my office key on my person.With immediate effect,you do not leave the office until you have checked with all the managers you support-this is for the lunch hour as well as at end of day,OK?,西南财经大
3、学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,4,“谴责信”中文,瑞贝卡:“我曾告诉过你,想东西、做事情不要想当然!结果今天晚上你就把我锁在门外,我要取的东西都还在办公室里。问题在于你自以为是地认为我随身带了钥匙。从现在起,无论是午餐时段还是晚上下班后,你要跟你服务的每一名经理都确认无事后才能离开办公室,明白了吗?”(英文原信的口气比上述译文要激烈得多),西南财经大学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,5,信件问题诊断,违背了商务信函的礼貌(Courtesy)原则。书信交往,同样需要以礼待人。因而在写信过程中,要避免伤害对方感情的表达。措辞上多选用些礼貌婉转词语,像would,could,may,please
4、,thank you 等。,西南财经大学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,6,商务信函的礼貌原则,使用礼貌友好的词汇,如 we would like to, we would be appreciated等。 体谅对方的写作态度(You-Attitude) 措辞得体(Appropriate Wording) 避免使用有性别歧视之嫌的词语, 如过多使用he, man等。 及时答复(Timely Response),西南财经大学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,7,总裁信件修改稿,Ms. Rebecca, On Tuesday evening, I failed to enter my office
5、partly because I forgot to hold the key on my person. But had you not locked the door of my office, I would have entered my office immediately. So each time you leave the office, could you please check with all the managers you support? Thank you for your consistent support for me. Yours truly,Soon Choo(Written by Zhang Jiarui),西南财经大学经贸外语学院,2019/5/1,8,Thank you!,西南财经大学经贸外语学院,