1、误用平行结构弗雷特 p.212 谈到“最致命的的问题就是想用匹配的结构却没用好” 。但同样致命的是对那些本来不匹配的成分使用匹配的结构。以上两种情况都会给人一种毫无头绪的印象。当把平行结构强加在那些逻辑上本不平行的成分中，其结果总会让人吃惊（例如， “Just like the Crowne Plaza, all rooms.”） 。有时，这种用法会故意产生幽默感。乔森 p.9 引用了这两个错误的平行结构“He took his hat and his leave”和 “He bolted his door and his dinner”。 乔森暗示人们都是出于搞笑的意图才会写：“He kee
2、ps fit, sleep, and his word .”但是逻辑上不一致的问题常常是不经意产生的。拉姆齐福勒和简艾伦 p.354 引用了一个误用的结构：The painting has subdued tone, great feeling, and a length of about three feet. 作者在这个毫无相似性的结构中无意间暗示了一种相似性。克莱尔库克 p.67 给出以下这个引人深思的平行结构：The police found no alcohol in his bloodstream but a loaded gun in his car. 这一结构几乎没什么意义。杰
3、克斯巴润和亨利格拉芙，像弗雷特一样，坚持认为平行结构一旦开始使用就应贯穿始终，然而他们强调，这种结构如果一开始就不符合逻辑就不应使用。杰克斯巴润和亨利格拉芙说：“平行结构是如此重要的一种写作工具以至于平行结构的使用必须是纯粹的，所以不要将平行形式用在迥然不同的观点中。 ”如果你能记住以上这点建议，你就会避免拿破仑战争中那位法国退伍军人在叙述自己三次受伤经历时所犯的错误：Once in an ambush, once in the leg, and once in the Netherlands.对二十个例子的修改1）A：Economically, we are struggling for t
4、he democracy of distribution of food grain, reduction production. B：Economically, we are struggling to ensure the democratic distribution of grain, reduce rents and interest rates, increase wages, eliminate unemployment and develop production. 句意为：从经济上说，我们正努力保证粮食的民主分配，减少租金和利率，增加工资，消除失业，发展生产。- 例句 A 中
5、有三个名词和由并列连词 “and” 连接的两个动名词。这种结合是非常尴尬的，尤其是因为动名词不能跟在动词后面（例如， “we are struggling for getting rid of ”就不是英语） 。-若将 “for” 改为 to，那么所有的五个要素就转换成了不定式：“we are struggling to ensure . reduce .etc. ”这些更改不仅会产生一些可行的平行结构而且也能那三个动词和两个动名词。（“Food ”作为可有可无的形容词而被删除：it can be taken for granted that unless otherwise stated,
6、grain is for human consumption.）1) 以下例句来自一张京剧表演票的背面：A：After renovation Hu Guang Guild Hall has been turned into Beijing Traditional Operas Museum, which is a cultural center with multifunction such as opera performing, exhibition, shopping and restaurant, etc.B：After renovation, the Hu Guang Guild H
7、all has been turned into Beijing Traditional Operas Museum, a multifunctional cultural center including an opera hall, exhibition space, shops, restaurants, etc. 句意为：湖广会馆在改造后已成为北京传统戏剧博物馆，这个多功能的文化中心有一 个歌剧厅、展览区、商店、餐馆等。 - 例句 A 中又有一系列由“and”连接的词，其中名词和动名词混合使用。- 此外，前三个要素（“performing” ， “exhibition”， “shopp
8、ing” ）都是代表活动的 抽象词，而 第四个词（“restaurant” ）是表示地点的具体的词。 （如果最后一个词和前三个相似比如 “dining”，那么动词和动名词的结合可能就容易接受了。 ）在修改后的句子中，四个词全部被替换为具体名词来命名为不同的地方。(回顾： “Beijing Traditional Operas Museum” 被拼写为“Beijing Museum of Traditional Operas ”，这样就可以避免名词“Museum”前形容词和名词的堆砌)3) A：The forces were greatly reduced in number because o
9、f persistent march under the heat of the midsummer sun, fatigue, plus deaths and the wounded in battles and deserters during the march. B：Their numbers were now greatly reduced because of battlefield casualties, desertions, and the exhaustion of constant marching under a blazing midsummer sun. 句意为：他
10、们的人数大大减少了，因为战场上有伤亡、逃兵且在仲夏炎炎烈日之下持续行走让人精疲力尽。 - 这次，如果我们将例句 A 中的过去分词 “wounded”(cf. “the injured”“ the unemployed,”etc. )看作名词，那么例句 A 就是完全由名词组成。但是这些名词是没有可比性的。- 前两个词 “march(ing)” 和 “fatigue” 并不相似，因为第二个词不是独立的危害而是第一个词的结果。- 最后的三个词 “death,”“the wounded,”“ deserter”在逻辑上的顺序应该是“death” /“wounded” /“ desertions”(损失
11、的三种原因) 或者是“the dead”/ “the wounded” /“ the deserters”(三种人)等等。- B 句中的“march” 和 “fatigue” 组成一个短语，表示这两者之间的关系（“the exhaustion of constant marching”） 。 “death”和 “the wounded”折合为一个词（“casualties” ） 。- 所列举的这些原因就这样从五个不一致的词缩减到三个相对一致的词：“casualties”， “desertions”， “exhaustion”4) A：Most public grain has already
12、been collected; standardized tax regulations, tax items and tax rates have been promulgated; and because the mainland has been liberated, tax receipts have been greater than last year.B：Most public grain has already been collected; standardized tax rates and regulations, and lists of taxable tax ite
13、ms have been promulgated; and because the mainland has been liberated, tax receipts have been greater than they were last year.句意为：大多数公粮已经收集；标准税率和法规及一系列应纳税项已颁布；因为内地已解放，因此税款收入已超过去年。 - 在 A 句中，第二个从句中的三个主语都是又都是名词，但是顺序又不一样。 “Regulations” 和 “rates”是抽象名词，但应纳税的 “iterms” (像盐或驾照之类的实物) 是具体名词，而且不像其他的两个词，不能被“pro
14、mulgated”（比如，宣布或公告） 。B 句中抽象词“lists ”是用来解决这一问题的。-（在最后一个从句中， “tax receipts”无意间和 “last year”形成比较关系而非去年的纳税收据。更正错误之后的句子如下：“tax receipts have been greater than they were last year.”）5）A：But even so, it will be hard to prevent expenditure from exceeding revenue and a fall in revenue, and there may be such
15、factors as a grain shortage that will contribute to price rise.B：But even so, it will be hard to prevent expenditure from exceeding revenue and keep revenue from falling, and other factors, such as a grain shortage may also drive price up.句意为：但是即便如此，这将很难避免开支超过收入，且不让收入下降。其他因素像粮食短缺也可能推动价格上涨。 - 在 A 句中，
16、 “prevent”的两个宾语并非同一语法类型：第一个 （“expenditure from exceeding revenue”）是一个完整的短语，而第二个宾语（“a fall” ）是单个名词。- 在修改后的句子中，这两个宾语各自增加一个独立的动词并分开使用， 这样“prevent expenditure from exceeding”和“ keep revenue from falling”之间可以建立崭新而确切的平行结构。-（回顾：为了用表现力强的动词来代替表现力弱的名词，那么“contribute to price rise”就改为“drive prices up.”）6）A：Last
17、 month I went to Tingzhou and did the following with regard to contract negotiations for the grocery workers there:1. Studying first of all where the enterprises concerned really stand, whether the contract already negotiated has been observed, and what the demands of the workers are 2. Relying on t
18、he Party branch, strengthening its leadership and consolidating its organization3. The negotiated contract should be realistic and flexible, as required by the actual conditions of the grocery trade in Tingzhou.B：Last month I went to Tingzhou and did the following with regard to contract negotiation
19、s:1. First of all, I tried to find out where each enterprise actually stood, whether the contract already negotiated was being observed, and what the demands of the workers were2. I relied on the Party branch, strengthening its leadership and consolidating its organization3. I made sure that the neg
20、otiated contract was realistic and flexible and in keeping with the conditions in the grocery trade in Tingzhou.句意为：上个月我去汀州就合同谈判做了以下工作：1. 首先，我试图了解每一家企业所在地，企业履行商定合同的情况及工人的需求 2. 我借助党支部加强领导并巩固党组织。 。 。3. 我确保了所议定的合同既实用又灵活，并且该合同要符合汀州的杂货贸易的情况。 - 几页介入中间的文本将以上列举的三项内容隔开，因此，将这三项内容以平行的 形式呈现显得更加重要，这样可以帮助读者跟踪演讲者的
21、论点并记得这些事都是他在汀州做的。- 不过，A 句中的这三个并列观点在形式上并不一致：(1) 动名词（“studying ”） ；(2) 动名词（“relying ”， “strengthening”，“consolidating”） ；(3) 动词 （“should be”） 。更糟糕的是，那些结构从逻辑上说是不能跟在“I did the following”之后的。- 在修改后的句子中，这三项内容都被统一为同一形式，即相同主语跟及物动词 （“I tried to find out”， “relied on”， “I made sure”） 。-（回顾：“actual”对“condition
22、s”而言，因在意思上显得多余而被去掉。)7）A： Some intellectuals complain that our personnel contact them only on three things: namely, a transfer of work, a review of personal history, and when a mistake is committed. B： Some intellectuals complain that our people talk to them on only three occasions: when they are tra
23、nsferred to another job, when their personal history is being reviewed, and when they made a mistake. 句意为：一些知识分子抱怨我们老百姓和他们谈论就只在三个场合：当他们调换工作时，当他们的履历受审查时，当他们犯错误时。 -这一句中有一系列由“and ”连接的三个词条，因此每一词条应该属于同一语法范畴，但是 A 句的组成是：名词 +名词+从属从句。在改后的句子中，所有的三种要素都是从属从句。这一平行结构是通过重复使用同一连词“when”及同一模式（“when x happens”）强化形成的。这
24、一平行结构也是通过将“when a mistake is committed” 改为“when they make a mistake,”增加的，而这一结构和先前两个从句 （“when they”，“when their”， “when they”）联系更为紧密。-（用 “make a mistake”代替“commit a mistake”是因为后者不是地道的英语表达。 ）（回顾：结构上的变化也是为了将两个抽象名词“a transfer” 和 “a review” 转换为动词。将 “when a mistake is committed”改为主动语态要求一个陈述主体“they” ，这样的好处
25、就是进一步明确是谁犯了错误。 ）8）A：You have not only met Chairman Mao and visited our capital, but also have witnessed the power of our army and how the people love our Party and the leader.B：You have not only met Chairman Mao and visited our capital, but (also) witnessed the power of our army and the love the peo
26、ple bear our Party and our leader.句意为：你不仅见到了毛主席，参观了我们的首都而且还目睹了我们军队的实力和人民对我党和领导人的热爱。 - 在 A 句中，这些跟在“not only”和“but also”后的结构确切说并不一致。我们在“not only”后面找到的是“met”和“ visited”， “but also”后面是“have witnessed”。这一模型就是“You have not only x and y but also have z.”。创建准确的平行结构需要相关连词，笔者就删掉了“have”。因此，这一模型就变成了“You have no
27、t only x and y but also z.”。- A 句中“witnessed ”的两个宾语由并列连词“and”连接。这两个宾语也不是平行结构：一个名词 “power” 和一个名词从句（ “how the people love”) 一致。改后的句子是将这一从句改为另一名词（“love” ） 。9) A：This shows on the one hand that Chinas vehicle and component industries are still highly fragmented but on the other hand it is indicative of
28、the enthusiasm displayed by manufacturers in trying to tap into Chinas rapidly expanding automotive market. B：This shows, on the one hand, that Chinas vehicle and component industries are still highly fragmented but, on the other hand, that many manufacturers are eager to tap into the rapidly expand
29、ing automotive market. 句意为：这表明，一方面，中国的汽车和零部件行业仍高度分散，但是另一方面，很多生产商都迫切想打入迅速扩大的汽车市场。- 这里由并列连词“but also”连接的成分都是独立的从句。但有心的读者仍会觉得 A 句不完美。介词短语“on the other hand”像某个相关连词的第一部分，因为这一短语就设定了还会有另一短语的预期。正如上面“not only. but also”的例子中，跟在第二部分的成分应和跟在第一部分的成分保持一致。- A 句并不是这样的情况。 “On the other hand”后面跟一个不独立的从句（“that Chinas
30、vehicle and component industries are etc.”)，而“on the other hand”后跟一个独立从句（“it is indicative of etc.”） 。修改后的句子中，为了和第一个从句（“that many manufacturers are .”）保持一致，第二个从句改为不独立从句。- 另一种解决方法就是将第一个从句改为独立从句以和第二个句子保持一致。那就会出现：“On the one hand this shows that . but on the other hand it indicates (or:shows ) that ”10
31、) A：They unanimously suggested that more funds should be injected into scientific development, that a more flexible system be introduced to help the transfer of talent between economic sectors and scientific institutes, and that more efforts are needed to accelerate the transfer of the fruit of scie
32、ntific research into industrial and agricultural production.B：They unanimously suggested that more funds should be allocated for scientific development, that a more flexible system be introduced to facilitate the exchange of highly trained people between economic enterprises and scientific institute
33、s, and that more efforts should be made to ensure that the results of the scientific research are rapidly applied in industry and agriculture.句意为：他们一致认为应该分配更多资金来促进科学发展，应该引入更为灵活的体系来促进经济企业和科学机构中训练有素员工的交流，同时应该更加努力的确保科研成果能快速应用到工农业中。- 这里 A 句又达到了语法范畴一致的要求：由 “and” 连接的所有这三部分都是由“that”引导的从属从句。- 但是批判性读者仍会再一次感到
34、不舒服，因为从其他方面来看，这三个从句并不属于平行结构。他们都有不同的形式：“that x should be done”/“that y be done”/“that efforts are needed to do z.”- 在 B 句中，第二和第三个从句确实和第一个从句的形式保持一致：“that x should be done.” 结构较为紧凑的平行结构很容易实现，而且更能愉悦身心。-“Economic sectors”改为“economic enterprises”，这样就不会在抽象名词 “sectors”和具体名词“ institutes”形成平行结构。-（将“ talent”改为
35、“highly trained people”是因为在第八章的 234 页提到，英语中这个词很少在这样的语境中使用。特别是在商业节目之外的情况，“talented”人不是指“talent” 。)11）A：If state revenue is not only centralized, if state expenditure is not determined in accordance with the same regulations and inobservation of the principle of austerity . The inevitable result will
36、be a waste of financial resources and aggravated inflation.B：If control of the state revenue is not centralized, and if decisions regarding state expenditures are not made in accordance with a uniform of regulations and a consistent principle of austerity . The inevitable result will be a waste of f
37、inancial resources and aggravated inflation.句意为：如果政府收入的控制不实施集权化，如果政府支出决策的制定不遵 循整套法规和一贯紧缩的原则，那就会不可避免地产生浪费财政资源并恶化通货膨胀的结果。- A 句很充分，因为“and” 连接两个介词短语，但是这个句子可以很紧凑并有所改善。-“In accordance with” 和“in observation of”意指同一事物且发挥同样的作用（修改动词 “determined”） ，因此这两个短语就可以合为一种表达。在 B 句中，这两个短语就变成了一个短语“in accordance with”。-“I
38、n accordance with the same regulations”提出这个问题“the same as what?” （可能是和其他地方的一样，比如，相同的一切地方，但并没有陈述） 。因此，笔者取代了“a uniform set of regulations.”-“Consistent”就被引入了（“a consistent principle of austerity”） 。这样做的一个目的是为了明确意思，即根据相同的规则，每件事都应在每个地方以同样的方式完成；另一个目的是想通过平衡“a uniform set of regulations” 中“uniform”来提升这一平行结
39、构。-（为了更好地体现逻辑性，笔者将句子开头的 “state revenue” 改为 “control of state revenue”：不是以钱为“中心” ，而是以掌控钱为“中心”。 ）12）A：The purpose of struggling against the KMT was not to overthrow its rule but to hinder it from capitulating to the Japanese invaders and from fighting against the Communist Party and to keep it in the
40、anti-Japanese united front.B：The purpose of struggling against the KMT was not to overthrow its rule but to prevent it from capitulating to the Japanese invaders, fighting the Communists and abandoning the anti-Japanese united front.句意为：反抗国民党的目的不是为了推翻国民党的统治，而是为了阻止它向日本侵略者投降，对抗共产党及放弃抗日合作统一战线。- 这里的相关结构
41、 “not .but” 顺序正确，每一部分后面都跟一个不定式（“not to overthrow .but to hinder .”） 。- 由 “and”连接的并列结构同样是可接受的，因为所连接的这两部分都是不定式（“to hinder . and to keep”） 。然而，如果稍作修改，这一结构可能会更好。-A 句中的两个要素由“hinder it from” 来控制（“capitulating to the invaders”和 “fighting against the CP”） 。B 句中的第三个要素“to keep it in the united front” 改为和前两个要素
42、相同的形式：“hinder it from capitulating . fighting . and abandoning.” - 正如前面的例子，这种简缩的结果就是不仅会使平行结构更有气势，而且还使得陈述更加有序和简洁。- (将“Hinder ” 改为“prevent ” 仅仅是因为“ prevent” 这个词更恰当。) 13）A：At this meeting it was decided that a part of the Red army led by Peng Dehuai and Teng Daiyuan should stay to defend the Jinggang M
43、ountains and that Mao Zedong, Zhu De and Chen Yi should lead the main forces of the Fourth Army, numbering 3600, to march toward southern Jiangxi to launch an attack.B：At this meeting it was decided that a part of the Red Army, led by Peng Dehuai and Teng Daiyuan, should stay to defend the Jinggang
44、Mountains,while the main forces of the Fourth Army, numbering 3,600, led Mao Zedong, Zhu De and Chen Yi should march to southern Jiangxi to launch an attack there.句意为：此次会议决定：由彭德怀和滕代远领导的红一方面军保卫井冈山；由毛泽东、朱德及陈毅领导的第四军主力 3600 人进军江西南部并发动进攻。- A 句不太需要平行结构，因为由并列连词“and”连接的这两个要素都是非独立从句。如果想让这两个词表达更加一致，那还是比较容易做到和
45、满足的。- 第一个分句的模式是：“x troops, led by y, should do z”； 第二个分句的模式是：“y should lead x troop to do z.”在修改后的句子中，第二句要和第一句保持一致：“the main forces of the Fourth Army, led by Mao et al . , should march ”-（修改后的句子能进一步更正中式英语结构 “lead the main forces to march”。在英语中，你可以引导人们去一个地方，不论是字面意思像“gate”或“other side of the river” 还
46、是隐喻像“victory”或 “conclusion”。但是 “lead” 除了有“induce”或“persuade”意思之外，你不能引导人们去做一些像 “cross the river”， “ win a victory” 或 “march to southern Jiangxi”之类的事。- 为了强调这两支兵力同时行动，那么就要将这两分句的逻辑连接词 “and” 改为 “while”。)14）A：The environment in which we find ourselves invariably has limitations, so we should examine thing
47、s from various angles. Everyone inevitably has limits in his cognition, therefore we should pay great heed to different views.B： The environment in which we find ourselves is necessarily limited, so we should examine things from different angles. Our knowledge too is necessarily limited, so we shoul
48、d pay attention to different views.句意为：我们了解自己的环境是有限的，所以我们应从不同的角度来了解自己。我们的知识也是有限的，所以我们应关注不同的观点。- 以上两种陈述在意思上明显是平行的。版本 A 在语法上是一致的，但没有平行句式，也会显得笨拙。在修正的版本中，两个句子都有相同的模式而且基于相同的关键词（“x is necessarily limited”/“y is necessarily limited”） ，这样逻辑上的相似性就会一目了然。-这两句中所附带的词也要保持一致以提高这个结构的平行度：“invariably”/“inevitable， ”
49、“so”/“therefore”和“various ”/“different”都是用来配对的。-（加“ Too”是为了表示这两个句子之间的逻辑连接关系。 ） -（回顾：从“has limits”到 “is limited”的这种结构上的变化可以省掉三个抽象名词：“limitations” ， “limits”， “cognition”。 ） 15）A：The purpose of our meeting is to end the past and open up a new era. By ending the past, I mean we can leave it aside and concentrate on the future. B：The purpose of our meeting is to put the last behind us and open up a new era. By putting the past behind us I mean ceasing to talk about it and focusing on the future.句意为：我们此次会议的目的是把过去抛在脑后，开创一个新时代。忘记过去意思就是不谈论过去而
