1、建议信 2,廖泽凯,得分情况,课外作业,Lora 来信说他想利用暑假打工，但父母不同意。假定你是李华，请给Lora写一封回信。要点如下： 1. Lora打算利用暑假打工。2. Lora父母不同意的理由。3. 你给Lora的具体建议。注意:1. 词数100左右。2. 可以适当增加细节，以使行文连贯。3. 开头语和结束语已为你写好。 Dear Lora,I have just read your letter asking for my advice._Anyway, I would be more than happy to wish you a pleasant summer. Yours f
2、aithfully,Li Hua,第一人称和第二人称,一般现在时,1. Lora打算利用暑假打工。 2. Lora父母不同的理由。 3. 你给Lora的具体建议。,第一段：你（Lora）打算暑假打工，你的父母不同意。 第二段：父母不同意的理由。 第三段：我给的建议 第四段：我希望你过一个愉快的暑假。,模板+单词+短语+句型,1. 人称和时态 所有同学均使用了第一人称指代Li Hua；第二人称指代Lora。 所有同学均使用了一般现在时表述文章的主体部分。,2. 要点和结构 使用了四段，且第二段讲述了“你的父母不同意做兼职工作的原因”；第四段讲述了“我的建议”的同学： 黄圆圆；陈典；邓一飞；张志文
3、；柳昂然。,3. 表达：建议信模板,Dear Jim，Im glad to receive your letter _ for my advice _ how to _ (引出主题).Here are a few suggestions. First, it is important to _. Besides, it should be a good idea to _. You can also _. (此三句不同的句式提出建议). As to _, I suggest _ (有时根据需要,具体到某一反面). In addition, _ (其他建议). Im sure _ (预测可能的结
4、果，给对方以行动的信心和决心).Im looking forward to _ (表达愿望). Sincerely yours, XX,asking,on,说服某人做某事 persuade sb. into doing sth.同意某人 agree with sb. 就.达成一致意见 agree on/ about sth. 同意某人做某事 agree that sb. could do sth.做兼职工作 do a part-time job,3. 表达：单词，短语，句型,说服你的妈妈同意你做兼职工作 persuade your mother into agreeing that you c
5、ould do a part time job认为 学习是最重要的任务 regard learning as the most important task 太小了不适应工作 too young to work 利用暑假来学习 make use of this summer holiday to study,安全 adj. safe 安全 n. safety做某事太危险 it is dangerous for sb. to do sth. 独自一人工作太危险 it is dangerous for you to work alone.,和某人贴心交谈 have a heart-to-heart
6、 talk with sb. 为学习和工作制作一个详细的计划 make a detailed plan for your study and work 足够大来处理好事情 be old enough to manage things properly 让你的朋友和你一起工作 ask your friends to work together with you 让某人知晓（你的情况） keep sb. informed,3. 语篇评讲 Try to find advantages and disadvantages of these sentences by yourselves!,Try to
7、 improve those sentences（大家来找“茬”）,第一段：孙思源 The word comes that your parents disagree with you do part-time job during summer vacation. 优点：The word comes that 据说 不足：disagree 用法错误 提升方法： 不同意某人做某事 disagree that sb. could do sth. The word comes that your parents disagree that you could do a part-time job
8、during summer vacation,词组，句型提升,第一段：肖诗颖 I have just read your letter asking for my advice on how to make use of summer part-time give your parents agreement. 优点：I have just read your letter asking for my advice on . 不足：语法错误，句子太长！ 提升方法： 用persuade和agree表达“说服你的父母同意你能在暑假做兼职”. 词组句型提升：I have just read your
9、 letter asking for my advice on how to persuade（吴晓龙，柳昂然） your parents into agreeing that you could do a part-time job in summer vacation.,词组，句型提升,I have just read your letter asking for my advice on how to persuade your parents into agreeing that you could do a part-time job in summer vacation.,What
10、 is wrong with this sentences？,It is too long！,刘灿 I have just read your letter asking my advice on summer part-time job. You want to do a part-time job. But your parents disagreed. Here are my constructive （魏康）suggestions.,句号，连词分割，分句表达,第二段 刘辉：They dont agree it, Maybe they just worry your safe or yo
11、ur age. 优点：理由充分：考虑到安全和年龄。 不足：1. agree 表达不同意某人？maybe 的词性？safe的词性？ 提高： 他们不同意你，因为他们仅仅只是担心你的安全；并且他们认为你太小了，而不适合做兼职。 They dont agree with you, because they just worry about your safety（姜民扬）. Besides，they may think you are too young to work.,连词，过渡词连接，分句表达！,吴玉兰：I think you should put youself in your parents
12、s shoes. Maybe in their opinions, they think you are too young to do a part-time job. 优点： put onself in ones shoes：与某人换位思考 不足：parents,谚语，名言提升作文！,Which sentence do you like best？,第二段 （张泽士）But your parents disagree. They said that will influence your study. （陶琼）They think the study is more important t
13、han part-time job. （范文）Your parents may regard learning as the most important task for you. Perhaps theyd like you to make use of this summer holiday to study.,第三段： 陈雪梅 But you also know get a job in this summer holiday is beneficial for your ability. So clam yourself down and have a communication w
14、ith your parents they must understand with you too! 优点：逻辑连贯，说理充分 不足：语法错误,提升 But you also know getting a job in this summer holiday is beneficial for your ability. So clam yourself down and have a heart-to-heart talk with your parents（罗七一）. I believe they can understand you too!,动名词做主语，句型，分割句子，单词用法！,
15、黄圆圆 However, if you really have an interest to do the part job, it is vital that you should take saftety into account. 优点：it is vital that should+do原型take sth. into account 不足：搭配错误 提升： However, if you really have an interest in doing the part-time job, it is vital that you should take safety into ac
16、count.,短语用法提升！,黄子恒 But remember, dont qurrel with your parents. If you do this, your parents will feel sad and they will never agree your plan. 优点：建议中提到了注意事项。 不足：语法错误，agree on your plan 提升：吴玉兰 If your parents still disgree with you， you should follow their advice and dont argue with them. 程博 If they
17、 still dont agree, I advise you talk with your parents patiently, (and) dont be angry with them.,王婷：In my opinion, you can find a job in a library so that you can not only get a job, but also studying at the same time. It maybe a win-win idea. 优点：图书馆工作，学习工作两不误not only. but also. 不仅.而且.a win-win idea
18、 双赢的方法； 不足：studying 改为 study,邱骞 They are afraid you in danger, too. So I think you should take some friends to work together. 优点：和朋友一起做兼职，打消父母的疑虑 不足：take some friends to work together.怀揣着朋友一起来工作 提升：方意 You can tell your parents that you will invite some friends work together. They are afraid that you will be in danger.,4. 作文修改 参考范文和吴玉兰，杨金洋，王成灿，万慧琳，黄瑶佳的作文修改自己的作文。,
