1、老友记剧本 1-10The One With the Monkey-Written by: Adam Chase Monica gets it)Monica: Hi.Sandy: Hi, Im Sandy.Joey: Sandy! Hi! Cmon in! (She enters, followed by a young boy and a younger girl).You brought your kids.Sandy: Yeah. Thats okay, right?(Joey and Monica look at each other and shrug. Ross enters wi
2、th Marcel on his shoulder)Ross: Par-tay! Monica: That thing is not coming in here.Ross: That thing? This is how you greet guests at a party? Let me ask you something, if I showed up here with my new girlfriend, she wouldnt be welcome in your home?Monica: Im guessing your new girlfriend wouldnt urina
3、te on my coffee table.Ross: Okay. He was more embarrassed about that than anyone. Okay? And for him to have the courage to walk back in here like nothing happened.Monica: Alright. Just keep him away from me.Ross: Thank you. (She walks off) Cmon, Marcel, whaddya say you and I do a little mingling? (M
4、arcel runs off) Alright, Ill, uh. catch up with you later.(The door opens. Rachel is standing there. Her coat is muddy and torn, her hair is dishevelled and her face is bruised. Everyone turns to look)Monica: Oh my gosh! Rachel, honey are you okay? Where-wheres Paolo?Rachel: Rome. Jerk missed his fl
5、ight.Phoebe: And then. your face is bloated?Rachel: No. Okay. I was at the airport, getting into a cab, when this woman- this blonde planet with a pocketbook- starts yelling at me. Something about how it was her cab first. And then the next thing I know she just starts- starts pulling me out by my h
6、air! So Im blowing my attack whistle thingy and three more cabs show up, and as Im going to get into a cab she tackles me. And I hit my head on the kerb and cut my lip on my whistle.oh.everybody having fun at the party? (To Monica) Are people eating my dip?Time lapse. Monica and Rachel, fixed up som
7、ewhat, emerge from a bedroomSandy: Yknow, when I saw you at the store last week, it was probably the first time I ever mentally undressed an elf.Joey: Wow, thats, uh, dirty.Sandy: Yeah.(They almost kiss and then Joey realises her kids are staring at them)Joey: Hey, kids.Ross: (Watching Marcel play w
8、ith Phoebe. To Chandler) Look at him. Im not saying he has to spend the whole evening with me, but at least check in.Janice: (Startles them) There you are! Haaah, you got away from me!Chandler: (Imitating) But you found me!Janice: Here, Ross, take our picture. (Hands him a camera and he starts snapp
9、ing) Smile! Youre on Janice Camera!Chandler: Kill me. Kill me now. (Someone else knocks on the door. Monica looks through the spyhole)Monica: Hey everybody! Its Fun Bobby!(Everyone cheers. Monica opens the door. Bobby is obviously very depressed)Fun Bobby: Hey, sorry Im late. But my, uh, grandfather
10、, he- died about two hours ago. But I-I-I couldnt get a flight out til tomorrow, so here I am!Joey: (Approaching) Hey Fun Bobby! Whoah! Who died?(Monica gestures wildly behind Fun Bobbys back) Time lapse. Bobby is talking about his grandfather. Everyone else is virtually in tearsFun Bobby: Its gonna
11、 be an open casket, yknow, so at least Ill- I get to see him again.Janice: (Ross is still taking their photo) Oh, Im gonna blow this one up, and Im gonna write Reunited in glitter.Chandler: Alright, Janice, thats it! Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice, when I invited you to this party I didnt necessarily t
12、hink that it meant that we-Janice: Oh, no. Oh, no.Chandler: Im sorry you misunderstood.Janice: Oh my God. You listen to me, Chandler, you listen to me. One of these times is just gonna be your last chance with me. (She runs off)(Ross is still taking photos)Chandler: Oh, will you give me the thing. (
13、Snatches the camera)(David is feeding Phoebe popcorn. Max walks up)Phoebe: Hi, Max!Max: Yoko. (To David) Ive decided to go to Minsk without you.David: Wow.Max: It wont be the same- but itll still be Minsk. Happy New Year.(Walks off)Phoebe: Are you alright?David: Yeah, Im fine, Im fine. (Phoebe leads
14、 David into a bedroom)Phoebe: Youre going to Minsk.David: No, Im. not going to Minsk.Phoebe: Oh, you are so going to Minsk. You belong in Minsk. You cant stay here just cause of me.David: Yes I can. Because if I go it means I have to break up with you, and I cant break up with you.Phoebe: Oh yes, ye
15、s, yes you can. Just say, um, Phoebe, my work is my life and thats what I have to do right now. And I say your work?! Your work?! How can you say that?!. And then you say, um, its tearing me apart, but I have no choice. Cant you understand that?. And I say (Hits him) no! No! I cant understand that!.
16、David: Uh, ow.Phoebe: Ooh, sorry. Um, and, and then you put your arms around me. And then you put your arms around me. (He does so) And, um, and then you tell me that you love me and youll never forget me.David: Ill never forget you.Phoebe: And then you say that its almost midnight and you have to g
17、o because you dont wanna start the new year with me if you cant finish it. (They kiss) Im gonna miss you. You scientist guy.Dick Clark: (on TV) Hi, this is Dick Clark, live in Times Square. Were in a virtual snowstorm of confetti here in Times Square.(Joey puts a blanket over Sandys kids)Joey: There
18、 ygo, kids.Chandler: (To a woman who he has clearly just met) And then the peacock bit me. (Laughs) Please kiss me at midnight. (She leaves)Joey: You seen Sandy?Chandler: Ooh. Uh, I dont know how to tell you this, but shes in Monicas bedroom, getting it on with Max, that scientist geek. Ooh, look at
19、 that, I did know how to tell you.Rachel: Vrrbddy, the bll is drrbing.All: (in the kitchen) What?Rachel: The bll is drrbing!Dick Clark: (on TV) In twenty seconds itll be midnight.Chandler: And the moment of joy is upon us.Joey: Looks like that no date pact thing worked out.Phoebe: Everybody looks so
20、 happy. I hate that.Monica: Not everybodys happy. Hey Bobby!(Bobby waves and then bursts into tears. Midnight comes and everyone at the party except for the gang cheers and kisses)Chandler: Yknow, I uh just thought Id throw this out here. Im no math whiz, but I do believe there are three girls and t
21、hree guys right here. (Makes kiss noise)Phoebe: I dunno. I dont feel like kissing anyone tonight.Rachel: I cant kiss anyone.Monica: So Im kissing everyone?Joey: Nonono, you cant kiss Ross, thats your brother.Ross: Perfect. Perfect. So now everybodys getting kissed but me.Chandler: Alright, somebody
22、kiss me. Somebody kiss me, its midnight! Somebody kiss me!Joey: Alrightalrightalright. (Kisses him. Ross takes a photo) There.Closing CreditsScene: Monica and Rachels, time lapse.Ross: (Watching Marcel and talking to Rachel) I wanted this to work so much. I mean Im still in there, changing his diapers, pickin his fleas. but hes just phoning it in. Just so hard to accept the fact that something you love so much doesnt love you back.Rachel: .I think that bitch cracked my tooth.End-
