1、Battle Hymn of the Tiger MotherBiographyAmy Chua is the John M. Duff Professor of Law at Yale Law School. Her first book, World on Fire: How Exporting Free Market Democracy Breeds Ethnic Hatred and Global Instability, a New York Times bestseller, was selected by both The Economist and the U.K.s Guar
2、dian as one of the Best Books of 2003. Her second book, Day of Empire: How Hyperpowers Rise to Global Dominance-and Why They Fall, was a critically acclaimed Foreign Affairs bestseller.This biography was provided by the author or their representative.Editorial ReviewsFrom Publishers WeeklyChua (Day
3、of Empire) imparts the secret behind the stereotypical Asian childs phenomenal success: the Chinese mother. Chua promotes what has traditionally worked very well in raising children: strict, Old World, uncompromising values-and the parents dont have to be Chinese. What they are, however, are differe
4、nt from what she sees as indulgent and permissive Western parents: stressing academic performance above all, never accepting a mediocre grade, insisting on drilling and practice, and instilling respect for authority. Chua and her Jewish husband (both are professors at Yale Law) raised two girls, and
5、 her account of their formative years achieving amazing success in school and music performance proves both a model and a cautionary tale. Sophia, the eldest, was dutiful and diligent, leapfrogging over her peers in academics and as a Suzuki piano student; Lulu was also gifted, but defiant, who exce
6、lled at the violin but eventually balked at her mothers pushing. Chuas efforts “not to raise a soft, entitled child“ will strike American readers as a little scary-removing her children from school for extra practice, public shaming and insults, equating Western parenting with failure-but the result
7、s, she claims somewhat glibly in this frank, unapologetic report card, “were hard to quarrel with.“ (Jan.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.From Bookmarks MagazineMost critics agreed that Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an entertaining readlively and humorous, written with the intent
8、 to shock. More controversial is Chuas stereotyping of Chinese and Western cultures, not to mention her authoritarian parenting methods. Critics judged the book largely by asking the following questions: Should self-esteem come before accomplishment, or accomplishment before self-esteem? If the latt
9、er, should it be achieved by threats and constant monitoring? Chuas teenage daughters are undeniably accomplished, but at what emotional cost? While some reviewers found that Chuas technique borders on abuse and her writing was, at best, self-serving, others were impressed by her parenting results a
10、nd opined that the West could learn a few things from this remarkably driven Chinese American mother.An awe-inspiring, often hilarious, and unerringly honest story of one mothers exercise in extreme parenting, revealing the rewards-and the costs-of raising her children the Chinese way. All decent pa
11、rents want to do whats best for their children. What Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother reveals is that the Chinese just have a totally different idea of how to do that. Western parents try to respect their childrens individuality, encouraging them to pursue their true passions and providing a nurturin
12、g environment. The Chinese believe that the best way to protect your children is by preparing them for the future and arming them with skills, strong work habits, and inner confidence. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother chronicles Chuas iron-willed decision to raise her daughters, Sophia and Lulu, her
13、way-the Chinese way-and the remarkable results her choice inspires. Here are some things Amy Chua would never allow her daughters to do: - have a playdate - be in a school play - complain about not being in a school play - not be the #1 student in every subject except gym and drama - play any instru
14、ment other than the piano or violin - not play the piano or violin The truth is Lulu and Sophia would never have had time for a playdate. They were too busy practicing their instruments (two to three hours a day and double sessions on the weekend) and perfecting their Mandarin. Of course no one is p
15、erfect, including Chua herself. Witness this scene: “According to Sophia, here are three things I actually said to her at the piano as I supervised her practicing: 1. Oh my God, youre just getting worse and worse. 2. Im going to count to three, then I want musicality. 3. If the next times not PERFEC
16、T, Im going to take all your stuffed animals and burn them!“ But Chua demands as much of herself as she does of her daughters. And in her sacrifices-the exacting attention spent studying her daughters performances, the office hours lost shuttling the girls to lessons-the depth of her love for her ch
17、ildren becomes clear. Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother is an eye-opening exploration of the differences in Eastern and Western parenting- and the lessons parents and children everywhere teach one another. About the AuthorAmy Chua is the John M. Duff Professor of Law at Yale Law School. Her first book
18、, World on Fire: How Exporting Free Market Democracy Breeds Ethnic Hatred and Global Instability, a New York Times bestseller, was selected by The Economist as one of the best books of 2003. Her second book, Day of Empire: How Hyperpowers Rise to Global Dominanceand Why They Fall, was a critically a
19、cclaimed Foreign Affairs bestseller. She lives with her husband, two daughters, and two Samoyeds in New Haven, Connecticut.LANJmom 发表于：11-01-12 06:54 这周,一本今天发行上市的书在北美掀起极大风波.书名叫,作者 Amy Chua 蔡美儿是耶鲁法学教授，父母是从菲律宾移民美国的华裔，也是高级知识分子了，反正蔡爸爸是他研究领域的楚翘。这本书不是蔡美儿的学术专著，是一本记录，分享自己培养两个女儿的心路历程的书。估计是为了配合新书上市，几天前美国主流媒体，
20、发表了一篇文章，是这本书的一点节录，但是编者加了一个吸引眼球的题目为什么中国妈妈是一流的?“。这个题目，加上文章里提到那些非常严厉的教养孩子的举措，立刻把这本书推上了舆论的浪尖。各色人种，各个阶层的人都在评论，分了很多阵营。比如有华裔父母反对，认为蔡美儿的方式根本不能代表华裔，我们没那么严苛，不近人情；可是也有人，华裔,非华裔的提到自己身边不乏有相似者；还有人抨击蔡美儿是虐待儿童，心理不健康，等等，不一而足。我愿意以后多分享点这些评论，和自己的感想，今天没时间了，就把这篇文章的中文译文贴出来，请大家也对照一下。对了，里面有人评论，这可能是中国大陆妈妈们的方式方法，不代表华人移民家庭，你们觉得呢
21、？无论如何，作为市场营销手段，是成功的，至少我就买了本：-）为什么中国妈妈是一流的?许多人都想知道中国父母是如何抚养那些传统意义上的好孩子的，不管他们是否愿意做，都能把他们培养成数学天才和音乐神童，就像是由于家庭内部熏陶的一样。好了，我可以告诉他们，因为我做到了。下面列举的是我的女儿索菲亚和路易莎绝不允许做的事情：她提到自己的犹太婆婆“saw childhood as something fleeting to be enjoyed. I saw childhood as a training period, a time of build character and invest for t
22、he future”.我觉得太有目的性，目光永远投射在远方的的人生，把握不好的话，是很可怕和乏味的。我自己受其害多年，笑爸就是掉在这种陷阱里的人，我总说他是低头爬山，心里沉重地紧，看不到一路上繁花似锦，绿草依依，群山起伏。用这样的心态养孩子，错过了太多；而童年那些没有目的性的快乐时光，却恰恰是一个孩子成长为身心健康的 well rounded person必不能少的，帮助他们拥有一种积极乐观的人生态度，而这可能偏偏是达到那些远大目标最有效的手段。不然的话，看看那么多早就 burnout 的孩子的例子就知道了。 另外就是蔡教授对女儿人生的设计性太强，忽视了每个独立个体的主观能动性，没有相信孩子自
23、身的能力。她觉得儿童都不会愿意吃苦，所以 it is crucial to override childrens preference, to impose parents will. 这个要把度掌握好，尽管她在很多访谈上仍然坚持自己严苛的“中式教育”是行得通的，书里已经很明确的表明了，当年如果她不让步，会有很严重的后果的。书中写到 13 岁的女儿是怎样反叛，包括封闭自己，剪了自己头发，在公开场合和妈妈叫板等等。在长时间的拉锯对抗后的一次大爆发，导致妈妈最终妥协了-她同意 Lulu“放弃”小提琴（就是停止每周六三小时的乐队排练，每周日驱车 2 小时外的小提琴课程，改为和当地老师学，每天练半个小
24、时即可），开始打网球。女儿充满热情地投入到网球锻炼中，最终两年后，进步很快，还打到了校队。她“屈服”于女儿，有一个很重要的原因是想到了自己父亲的经历，老蔡教授从小就对家族事业不感兴趣，对科学有偏爱，所以不顾蔡美儿祖母的不满，只身来美读书，成就了一番天地。可惜，后来母子感情极淡“he barely spoke to his mother and never thought about her except in anger”.小蔡教授，想到这里，不寒而栗，因为不想失去女儿，她决定让步了。读到这，我真的为这对母女庆幸，也希望作者能在这个章节上多写一些她的反思和孩子后来的变化，可惜，她没花太多的笔墨
25、在上面，很可能是因为知道那些严苛的极端方式更赚人眼球。另外，显然女儿后来这些自发的成功是对她以前压迫式教育的嘲笑。反正，读完后我脑子里有个“WHAT IF”的问题挥之不去。她两个天姿聪颖的女儿如果开始不是那么投入地被练琴，是不是也早在其他方面 shine 了? 另外，书中作者略过，我却觉得有意思的地方是她在很多采访中，提到父母对她的严苛培养是很成功的，她们姊妹们都很感念父母，也尊崇父母。可是书中她提到申请大学时，她父亲要求她申请 UC-Berkeley，好住在家里，她在已被录取的情况下，仿造父亲的签名提交了哈佛的申请，后来被录取了。她家三个健康的女儿都是在东岸大藤里读书的，似乎父亲对她们的决定
26、有点感伤，那么潜意识里，这几个顺从的女儿是不是都在反叛？她提到她妈妈是典型的“中国妈妈”，永远觉得她做得不够好，哪怕今日她被各地邀请着演讲，她妈妈还能批评她语速太快等等，我想她对女儿近乎残忍地推可能和这样的成长经历不无关系，而是否如她表述，对此，她是心存感念，毫无怨言，只有她自己知道，考虑到她公公是个成功的psychotherapist, 我倒建议她去聊一聊。 书的后记提到这本书是全家人参与的一项工程，读的时候，我就恶毒地想好漂亮的伏笔，提到她把对丈夫的叙述减为最少了，因为觉得这部分应该让他自己写（同为耶鲁法学教授，蔡美儿的先生还是个小说家，他的第一部 thriller 小说曾列英国畅销排行榜
27、榜首，第二部小说下个礼拜上市），两个女儿对各自的描述都有不满，所以我大胆预测，后面还有好几本本书等着呢！ 题外话，我为什么觉得小孩子妈妈可以读一下呢？我觉得对于还是在成型阶段的小娃们，我们自然不该象她走那么远，做个 control freak，可是她对孩子的付出是不是也有可取之处，反正我是有点得着。 不管她行为如何极端，你不能否认她是个很爱自己孩子的妈妈，是个不吝付出的妈妈，她的付出也让我不寒而栗，因为我看到那不可逾越的距离。她不是个 SAHM，是耶鲁大学法学院的教授，可是她为女儿做的，时间，精力上的要求都是常人不可及的。这是她女儿放弃小提琴前的周末时刻表： Saturday： 1 hour
28、drive (at 8 am) to Norwalk, CT 3 hour orchestra practice 1 hour drive back to New Haven Homework 1-2 hour violin practice 1 hour fun family activity (optional) Sunday: 1-2 hours violin practice 2 hour drive to New York City 1 hour lesson with Miss Tanaka 2 hour drive back to New Haven Homework 这些 co
29、mmute，还有在场陪同，基本都是她做的。她两个女儿开始的音乐学习，都是那种要求家长在场的，所以她每次都是详细记录，事后自己还学习，所以她可以对女儿练琴做出非常专业性的指导，评价，她的耶鲁学生曾看到她家乒乓球房里她为女儿写下的练琴 instructional sheets, “I cant believe it. These are so -weird.” 而那几张纸，不过是她或写，或打印的几千张中的几张。前面提到的她把女儿从学校接出来上半个小时的小提琴课再送回去，这都是在她在耶鲁的授课，见学生，会议中间挤出来的时间。 对于她这些付出，她曾在不同场合被女儿，家人，朋友质问过做些到底是为了谁，为
30、了孩子，还是为了她自己？她觉得可以很坚定地说是为了孩子。”My answer, Im pretty sure, is that everything I do is unequivocally 100% for my daughters. My main evidence is that so much of what I do with Sophia and Lulu is miserable, exhausting, not remotely fun for me. Its not easy to make your kids work when they dont want to, to
31、 put in grueling hours when your own youth is skipping way, to convince your kids they can do something when they （and maybe even you） are e fearful that they cannot. To be honest, I sometimes wonder if the question Who are you really doing this for should be asked of Western parents too. Sometimes I wake up in the morning dreading what I have to do then thinking how easy it would be to say, Sure
