1、301 The One With the Princess Leia Fantasy301 The One With the Princess Leia FantasyScene Central Perk, the whole gang is enteringJoey: Im tellin ya that girl totally winked at me.All: Did not, she did not wink at you. (sees that their sacred couch is occupied by strangers) .Chandler: Huh. (They all
2、 leave, dejected) Opening CreditsScene: Rachel and Monicas, Phoebe, Ross, and Rachel are eating breakfast.Ross: I have to say Tupolo Honey by Van Morrison.Rachel: Nooo Way! The most romantic song ever is The Way We Were.Phoebe: See, I-I think that one that Elton John wrote for, um, that guy on Whos
3、The Boss.Rachel: What song was that, Pheebs?Phoebe: (singing) Hold me close, young Tony Dan-za.(Monica enters from her bedroom) Phoebe: Hi Monica!Ross: Hey Mon!Rachel: Hey Mon!(she just walks straight into the bathroom) Phoebe: Oh my God, has she slept at all?Ross: Nope.Rachel: No, its been three ni
4、ghts in a row.Ross: Yeah, she finally stopped crying yesterday, but then she found one of Richards cigar butts out on the terrace, so.Phoebe: Oh, okay that explains it. I got a call at two in the morning, but all I could hear was, like, this high squeaky sound, so I thought okay its like a mouse or
5、a opossum. But then I realized where would a mouse or a opossum get the money to make the phone call.Scene: Chandler and Joeys, Joey is coming in from the bedroomChandler: Morning.Joey: Morning, hey, you made pancakes?Chandler: Yeah, like theres any way I could ever do that.Janice: (entering and sin
6、ging) Monica and Rachel had syrup, now I can get my man to cheer up. (laughs hysterically) Good morning Joey.Joey: (sarcastically) Good morning.Chandler: Hey, you know what, heres a thought. Why dont you stay home from work today and just hang out with me.Janice: Oh, I wish. Look, honey, you have th
7、at report to finish, and I gotta go see my lawyer. Chandler: I can not believe that I am going out with someone that is getting divorced. Im such a grown up.Janice: (laughs) I-I-I gotta go, I gotta go. Okay, not without a kiss.301 （星际大战中的）莉亚公主那个女孩一定在跟我使眼色她才没有你总是以为别人在跟你使眼色我会认为是范莫里生的“陶此洛密糖”不会吧我会认为最浪漫的
8、曲子是“俏郎君”我觉得是艾尔顿强帮演“妙管家”的家伙写的歌那是什么歌?“抱紧我，年轻的汤尼丹佐”莫妮卡莫妮卡天啊她到底有没有睡觉?没有已经连续三个晚上了从昨天起，她终于不哭了但是她又在阳台发现理查抽过的雪茄好吧，这说明了为何我在清晨两点接到一通电话而我只能听到一些吱吱的声音我就想“一定是老鼠或负鼠”然后我就想，好吧老鼠或负鼠怎么会有钱打电话呢?早你做了松饼啊?是啊，你还以为我真的会做呢摩妮卡和瑞秋有糖浆我可以让我的男人开心了早安，乔伊早安你干脆别去上班跟我在一起就好了是啊，但愿如此你有报告要做而我得去见律师我真不敢相信我竟跟要离婚的女生约会我真像个大人我要走了给我个吻才能走或者我就不亲你这样你
9、就会留下来亲她！Chandler: Well, maybe I wont kiss you, and then youll have to stay.Joey: (under his breath) Kiss her! Kiss her!Janice: Ill see you later, sweetie. Bye Joey.Joey: B-bye Janice. So when ya dumpin her.Chandler: Nope, not this time.Joey: Come on, quite yankin me.Chandler: Im not yanking you.Joey
10、: This is Janice.Chandler: Yeah, I know. She makes me happy.Joey: Okay. All right. You look me in the eye and tell me, without blinking, that youre not breaking up with her. No blinking.Chandler: (looks him in the eye) Im not breaking up with her! (they stare at each other for a while, then Joey blo
11、ws in his face) Scene: Rachel and Monicas, Monica is entering from the bathroom.Monica: God, look what I found in the drain.Rachel: What?!Monica: Its some of Richards hair! (holds it close to Ross) What do I do with this?Ross: Getting it away from me would be job one.Monica: Its weird, but you know
12、what I dont wanna throw this away. I mean this is like all I have left of him, gross, drain hair. Ooh! (drops it in Rosss cereal) Phoebe: Ooh. Oh. It looks like, like a tiny little person drowning in your cereal. (Ross gives her this look, like Yeah, doesnt it, and gets up to dump it down the drain.
13、) Monica: God, what is wrong with me.Ross: You need to get some sleep.Monica: I need to get some Richard.Rachel: Monica, you broke up with him for a reason.Monica: I know, I know. Im just so tired of-of missing him. Im tired of wondering why hasnt he called. Why hasnt he called!Phoebe: Maybe, becaus
14、e you told him not to.Monica: What are you the memory woman?Joey: (entering) Their not breaking up. Chandler and Janice. Their not breaking up. He didnt blink or anything.Rachel: Well, you know Im not surprised. I mean have you seen them together, theyre really cute.Joey: Cute! This is Janice! You r
15、emember Janice?Rachel: Yes, Joey, I remember, shes annoying, but you know what shes-shes his girlfriend now. I mean what can we do?Joey: There you go! Thats the spirit Im looking for! What can we do? Huh? All right whos first? Huh? Ross?Ross: Well Im thinking that Chandlers our friend and Janice mak
16、es him happy, so I say we just all be adult about it and accept her.Joey: Yeah, well call that Plan B. All right?Scene: Rosss bedroom, Ross is working and Rachel is reading a 再见甜心，再见乔伊再见，珍妮丝你什么时候要甩掉她?不会这次不会了拜托，别整我了我又没有整你她可是珍妮丝对,我知道她让我很愉快好，你看着我的眼睛告诉我，不可以眨眼睛说你不会跟她分手但别眨眼睛我不会跟她分手天啊，你看我在排水管里发现什么?什么?这些是理查
17、的头发我该拿这些怎么办?第一件事就是把它从我身边拿开奇怪，但我并不想把它丢掉这些是我仅有的属于他的东西呕心的排水管的头发真好玩，好像有一个小人在你的麦片里淹死了我是怎么了?你需要一些睡眠我需要的是理查你跟他分手是有原因的我知道我只是不想再这么想他不愿再去想，他为何不打来?他为何都没打来?可能因为你叫他别再打来?你到底是什么?记忆女王吗?他们不会分手!我是说钱德和珍妮丝他们不会分手!他的眼睛连眨一下都没有我一点也不惊讶你看过他们在一起的样子吗?他们真的好可爱“可爱?”那可是珍妮丝!你记得珍妮丝吗?我记得啊，她很惹人厌但是你知道吗?她现在是他的女朋友那我们能怎么办?这就对了，我就是要这种精神“我们
18、能怎么办?”好，谁先来?罗斯?book in bedRachel: (she leans over and kisses him on the cheek) Honey, I was wonderingRoss: Hmm?Rachel: Do you still have that, um, Navy uniform?Ross: Nooo, I had to return it to the costume place.Rachel: Hmm.Ross: I think I have an old band uniform from high school.Rachel: You rememb
19、er not having sex in high school, right?Ross: Yeah.Rachel: Well honey, what about you?Ross: What?Rachel: I mean do you have any fun, you know, fantasy type things?Ross: No.Rachel: Come on you gotta have one!Ross: Nope.Rachel: Ross, you know what.Ross: What?Rachel: .if you tell me, I might do it.Ross
20、: Okay, umm. Did you ever see, um, Return Of The Jedi?Rachel: Yeah.Ross: Do you remember the scene with, um, Jabba the Hut? Well Jabba had as, as his prisoner, um, Princess Leia. Rachel: Oooh!Ross: Princess Leia, was wearing this, um, gold bikini thing. It was pretty cool.Scene: Central Perk, Phoebe
21、 and Rachel are therePhoebe: Yeah, oh, Princess Leia and the gold bikini, every guy our age loved that.Rachel: Really!Phoebe: Um, um. Its huge. Yeah, thats the moment, when-when, you know she stopped being a princess, and became, like, a woman, you know.Rachel: Did you ever do the-the Leia thing?Pho
22、ebe: Oh, yeah, um-mm. Oh!Rachel: Really! That-that great huh?Phoebe: No its just that I got this new pager and I have it on vibrate. See ya!Ross: (entering with Monica in tow) Hey!Rachel: Hi you guys!Ross: Look who I found standing outside of the Szechwan Dragon staring at a parking meter.Rachel: Mo
23、n. Hi! Monica: Hi.Rachel: Why arent you at work?Monica: Oh, they-they sent me home.Rachel: Why?Monica: Because I dont work at the Szechwan Dragon.Ross: Okay.Rachel: You really, really need to get some sleep, honey.钱德是我们的朋友而珍妮丝能让他快乐所以我们就成熟点，接受她这个先归类在B计划甜心我在想啊你那套海军制服还在吗?不，我拿去戏服店还了我还有一套高中乐团的旧制服你记得高中时不能
24、做爱吧?是啊甜心，那么你呢你有过任何有趣的幻想吗?没有别这样，你一定有没有罗斯，你知道吗?如果你跟我说或许我会帮你实现你有没有看过星际大战的“绝地大反攻”?你记不记得那场戏当赫特族的贾霸出现时?贾霸和他的囚犯莉亚公主莉亚公主穿着金色的比基尼那样子很好看莉亚公主穿金色比基尼?我们这年纪的男人都很喜欢真的吗?很重要的!那个时刻，她不再是个公主她变成了一个女人你曾扮过莉亚公主吗?真的吗?有那么棒啊?不，只是我买了新的呼叫器我把它调成“震动”再见你们好啊你看我在中国龙餐厅外找到谁了?她盯着停车收费表看你怎么没去上班?他们把我送回家了为什么?因为我并不是在中国龙餐厅上班你真的需要睡一下我知道该睡了你猜怎
25、么着?有人要发行我的论文真的吗?让我看看瑞秋，你看我那强壮的罗斯天行者何时会来拯救我?Monica: I know I do.Ross: Hi.Rachel: Hi.Ross: Guess what?Rachel: What?Ross: They published my paper.Rachel: Oh, really, let me see, let me see.Phoebe: Rach, look! (she holds two buns up to her ears to make her hair look like the Princess Leia do.) Oh, hi! W
26、here is my strong Ross Skywalker to come rescue me. (Ross stands up horrified) There he is.Scene: Chandler and Joeys, Joey is watching Wheel of Fortune, the puzzle is showing _oun_ Rush_ore.Chandler entersChandler: Hey!Joey: Wheel!Chandler: Of!Joey: Fortune! This guy is so stupid. (yelling) Its Coun
27、t Rushmore!Chandler: You know, you should really go on this show. All right, listen, I got three tickets to the Rangers tonight. Whatd ya say?Joey: I say, I am there! Cool! Aw, is Ross going to?Chandler: No, Janice.Joey: Jan-ice. Cause I, just, I feel bad for Ross, you know, we-we always go together
28、, were like the three hocke-teers.Chandler: You know, I may be way out on a limb here, but do you, do you, have a problem with Janice?Joey: No, Yeeees. God, how do I say this. (walks into the kitchen, Chandler follows closely, he turns around and gets startled) . Oh, hi, you know that girl from the
29、Greek restaurant with the hair (holds his hands up to signify she has big hair) ?Chandler: Ooh, that girl that I hate, eww, drives me crazy, eww, eww, oh!Joey: Look, I dont hate Janice, shes-shes just a lot to take, you know.Chandler: Well, there you go.Joey: Oh, hey. Come on man, dont look at me li
30、ke that, she used to drive you nuts before too, remember?Chandler: Well, Im crazy about her now. I think this could be the real thing. Capital R! Capital T! (Joey stares at him) Dont worry, those are the right letters.Joey: Look, what do you want me to say?Chandler: I want you to say that you like h
31、er!Joey: I cant. Its like this chemical thing, you know. Every time she starts laughing, I just wanna (grimaces and tenses up) pull my arm off just so that I can have something to throw at her. Chandler: Thanks for trying. (grabs the ticket and starts to leave) Oh, and by the way there is no Count R
32、ushmore!Joey: Yeah, then-then whos the guy that painted the faces on the 他来了幸运的!轮盘!这个家伙好笨是“罗斯莫尔”公爵啦你真的该去参加这个节目我有三张今晚游骑兵队的票你觉得如何?我一定去太棒了罗斯也会去吗?不，是珍妮丝珍妮丝?因为我会替罗斯难过你知道吗?我们总是一起去的我们是曲棍球三兄弟啊我可能误会你了但你是否反感珍妮丝?没有对啦天啊，我该怎么说?你知道希腊餐厅里那个头发很蓬的女孩子?那个我很讨厌的女孩子?她快把我这疯了听着，我不讨厌珍妮丝只是她令人难以忍受你说出来了吧别那样看着我以前她也快把你这疯了记得吗?但是我现
33、在为她疯狂这次可能是来真的我是说“真的”别担心，我说的字母是对的你到底要我说什么?我要你说你喜欢她我说不出来这种像是一种化学作用每次她一开始笑，我就想想把我的手臂拔下来我就能往她身上砸谢谢你的努力对了，根本就没有罗斯莫尔公爵!那是谁在罗斯莫尔山上塑了那些总统肖像?你怎么可以告诉她?我想又没什么大不了的她认为没什么大不了的?你这样子是在跟谁讲话?这些应该是我们之间很私密的对话菲比是我的女性好友，好吗?mountain? (Chandler gives him a look like You stupid idiot!) Commercial BreakScene: Monica and Rach
34、els, Rachel and Ross are enteringRoss: How could you have told her? Rachel: Ross, I didnt think it would that big of a deal.Ross: Oh, she didnt think it would be that big of deal.Rachel: Okay, who are you talking to when you do that?Ross: Look, that was supposed to be like a private, personal thing
35、between us.Rachel: Okay, Ross, Phoebe is my girlfriend, okay, we tell each other everything. You know, I mean, come on, guys do the same thing, I mean, what about all that locker room stuff.Ross: Thats different, okay. Thats like, uh Who dated a stripper? or Who did it on the back of the Staton Isla
36、nd Ferry?.Rachel: Were both of those Joey?Ross: Yeah. Look, you dont, you dont talk about like, you know, your girlfriend and the intimate stuff you, you do with her.Rachel: Not even with your best friend.Ross: Noo!Rachel: That is so sad. Your missing out on so much, Ross. I mean, the bonding and th
37、e sharing, you know. And-and knowing that someone else is going through the same thing you are.Ross: Hmph. So what you, you tell each other everything?Rachel: Pretty much.Ross: Did you talk about the night of five times? Do you tell people about the night of five times? Rachel: Uh, honey, yeah that
38、was with Carol.Ross: I know, but its still worth mentioning, I think.Scene: Monicas bedroom, Phoebe is trying to relax her.Phoebe: ( in a soothing voice) Relax every muscle in your body. Listen to the plinky-plunky music. Okay, now close you eyes, and think of a happy place. Okay, tell me your happy
39、 place.Monica: Richards living room, drinking wine.Phoebe: All right. No, no, no, not a Richard thing, just put down the glass. And get out!Monica: Im sorry, but thats my happy place.Phoebe: Well, okay, fine, use my happy place. Okay, Im just gonna, I have to ask that you dont move anything.Monica:
40、All right, Ill try not to.Phoebe: Okay, all right, so, your in a meadow, millions of stars in the skyMonica: Do you think breaking up with him was a huge mistake?Phoebe: All right, there are no questions in the happy place. Okay, just, the warm breeze, and the moonlight flowing through the treesMoni
41、ca: Ill bet hes totally over me, Ill bet hes fine.Phoebe: All right, betting and wagering of any kind, are, Im sure, not permitted in the happy place. Okay. Just-just, you know, the-the lovely waterfalls, and the, the trickling fountains. And the-the calming sounds of the babbling brook我们无话不谈的男人也一样啊
42、那些更衣室里的对话呢?那又不一样了，我们会谈像是谁跟脱衣舞娘约会或谁在史坦登岛渡轮后面做爱这两个都是乔伊吧难道你们不谈女朋友还有你们之间亲密的事?连最好的朋友也不谈?真可悲啊你们错过太多乐趣了那是种互相连结与分享的感觉并知道她们也和你经历过一样的事那你们什么都跟对方说吗?差不多啊你们有没有谈过夜五次的纪录?你有没有告诉她们那次一夜五次的纪录?甜心，你那次是跟凯萝我知道，我想还是值得一提全身肌肉放松听着叮叮咚咚的音乐好，闭上你的眼睛想一个很愉快的地方告诉我让你快乐的地方是哪里理查家的客厅，一起喝酒不不可以跟理查有关把酒杯放下，快出来对不起，那是让我快乐的地方好，我的快乐地方借你用但别弄乱我会试着
43、不乱动好，你现在在草地上天上有一片繁星你觉得分手是错误的吗?快乐的地方不准问问题只有和煦的微风和从树上撒下的月光我赌他一定忘了我我打赌他好得很快乐的地方不允许赌博和下注那里只有美丽的瀑布和缓慢流动着的喷泉还有低声轻语的小溪产生平静的音律好，一点用也没有我还是醒着的而且我得去上厕所我听说你讨厌我Monica: Okay, this isnt working. Im still awake and now I have to pee.Scene: Chandler and JoeysJanice: So, I hear, you hate me!Joey: I, ah, I never said
44、hate, I was very careful about that.Janice: A little birdie told me something about you wanting to rip your arm off and throw it at me.Joey: And you got a hate from that?! Your taking a big leap there.Janice: All right, fine, fine, fine, fine, fine, weve got to do something about our little situatio
45、n here Joey. So, this is my idea: you and me spending some quality time together.Joey: But what does that gonna do.Janice: For Chandler!Joey: Okay. Im in.Janice: Okay. All right. This is what were gonna call it: Joey and Janices DAY OF FUN!Joey: Does it have to be a whole day?Janice: Yes, because th
46、ats how long it takes to love me.Joey: Yeah, I know, I sleep in the next room.Scene: Central Perk, Rachel and Monica are enteringMonica: (crying) So, I went down to the post office, and it turns out it was those videos that I ordered for Richard about the Civil War. He loved the Civ)l War.Phoebe: Mo
47、nica, do you want us to take you home?Monica: Uh, huh. (to Ross) Or maybe to a galaxy far, far away. (Rachel, Monica, and Phoebe leave) Ross: Women tell each other everything. Did you know that?Chandler: Umm, yeah.Ross: No Chandler, everything! Like stuff you like, stuff she likes, technique, stamin
48、a, girthChandler: Girth? Why, why, why, wh-why, why, why, why would they do this? Ross: Rachel says sharings great and supposedly, you know, we outta be doing it. Do you wanna?Chandler: Were not gonna talk about girth are we?Ross: Nooo!Chandler: Yeah, okay.Ross: Yeah?Chandler: Yeah! All right! You g
49、o first.Ross: Okay, okay, Ill go first.Chandler: Okay.Ross: So, uh, the other night Rachel and I are in bed talking about fantasies, and I happened to describe a particular Star Wars thingChandler: Princess Leia in the gold bikini.Ross: Yes! Chandler: I know!Ross: Yes! Wow, well, that-that was easy. Okay, you-you go.Chandler: Okay.Ross: Okay.我没说我讨厌你我可是很小心的有人私下告诉我你想扯下手臂，丢到我身上这样你就觉得我讨厌你?你也太断章取义了吧好吧这种情形，我们得想点策略这是我的主意你和我花点时间，好好相处但是那有什么关系为
