1、顾客：小心，你的大拇指在我汤里了服务员：别担心，先生，不是很烫！A : Watch out! Your thumbs in my soup!B: Dont worry Sir its not that hot! 一个服务员给顾客拿来了牛排，大拇指在牛肉上。“你疯了吗？”顾客喊到，“你的手在我的牛排上！”“什么？”服务员说，“你想让它再掉地上？”A waiter brings the customer the steak he ordered with his thumb over the meat.A:Are you crazy?( yelled the customer ),with you
2、r hand on my steak?(What answers the waiter) You want it to fall on the floor again? 服务员：茶或咖啡？先生。第一个顾客：我要茶第二个顾客：我也是茶杯子要干净的！服务员：两杯茶，哪个要干净的杯子？B:(Waiter:) Tea or coffee gentlemen?A:Ill have tea.C:(2nd customer:) Me too - and be sure the glass is clean!(Waiter exits returns)B:(Waiter:) Two teas. Which o
3、ne asked for the clean glass?创新句子：我坚持用干净杯子喝茶。服务员，这只苍蝇在我汤里干什么？看起来象是在仰泳，A:Waiter whats this fly doing in my soup?Um looks to me to be backstroke sir.服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！别担心，先生，面包里的蜘蛛会干掉它。A:Waiter theres a fly in my soup!B:Dont worry sir the spider on the breadroll will get em. 服务员，我汤里有只苍蝇！不是，先生，那是蟑螂，苍蝇在你牛排里。A:
4、Waiter theres a fly in my soup!C:No sir thats a cockroach the fly is on your steak. 服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！别让别人看见，先生，要不别人都要。A:Waiter theres a fly in my soup!B:Keep it down sir or theyll all be wanting one.服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！我知道，先生，我们没有另收钱。A:Waiter theres a fly in my soup!C:Its OK Sir theres no extra charge!服务员，汤里有只苍蝇！对
5、不起，先生，我弄走那三个时忘了这个。A:Waiter there is a fly in my soup!B:Sorry sir maybe Ive forgotten it when I removed the other three.服务员，汤里有只死苍蝇！是的，先生，是开水杀死了它们。A:Waiter theres a dead fly in my soup!C:Yes sir its the hot water that kills them. 话剧前半部分是荆珂刺秦王搞笑英语话剧剧本 （Introduction）： Long ago there was a crazy country
6、, in this crazy country there were some crazy people, trying to show the crazy history by crazy ways. Mr Jingke was the most famous swordsman and was sent to kill king of Qing, “Yingzheng”. But finally he failed. Do you want to know what happened at that time? Okay, next show will tell you the truth
7、.Action I太子丹（上，掏出镜子梳头，做自恋状）： Mirror, mirror, tell me, who is the most pretty man in the world? (画外音：Its you, Prince Dan! 太子丹高兴状) Thank u mirror! （面对观众）Im Prince Dan, the magic mirror said I am the most attractive man in the world. But Ying Zheng is a jealous guy, I feel he will kill me if mirror tol
8、d him the truth. I am so scared. So what can I do? (向幕里大叫) Where is my minister? 阿三(毕恭毕敬) : Honey, I am coming. 太子丹：Ive told you again and again that you should call me “my most beautiful、graceful 、handsome、charming、cute、smart and dearest Prince Dan”! 阿三：Sure, honey! I have a good idea. We can find
9、a hero to kill YingZheng （作杀状）太子：Oh yeah. What is the most expensive commodity in this century? Talent!（二十一世纪最需要的是什么，人才！这句话要跟观众交流，最好由观众来回答，然后拍阿三肩膀，做赞许状） Good idea! But who is the right candidate? 阿三：After screening I have two promising persons on hand. One is Miss LiMoChou, the other is Mr JinKe. To
10、morrow they will PK for the NO1 killer of the world. 太子：Well, show me the winner as soon as possible, OK? 阿三：Yes.Action II（十面埋伏中刘德华 Dabao in white clothes ,a board with “NO SARS“) Dabao: Yangrouchuan, yangrouchuan. Eaten one, want nine. Eaten one, want nine. Xiaofu: Hi, Dabao: Hi. Two: What a famili
11、ar face. Two: Its you! Dabao: 10 years past, you are a still a tax collector. Xiaofu: 10 years past, you still sell Yangrouchuan. How is your business? Dabao: Everything is OK! 10 years past, you are still beautiful lady in Sanlihe of Beijing. Xiaofu: 10 years past, you and your Yangrouchuan look mo
12、re clean than 20 years before. Dabao: Thank you. No SARS, no dirtiness; Serve people, serve me. Xiaofu: Great! Have you Dabao: Married? I m not married; Im still single. Xiaofu: Have you claimed your tax this month? Dabao: What? Taxi? Oh, tax! Of course. I should pay the tax of 50 Yuan this month an
13、d I have claimed at the begin of this month. Xioafu: Your receipt, please. Dabao: (shows the receipt ) Here you are, I have paid my tax in the tax service center by computer. Xiaofu: Great! What a good taxpayer you are. Dabao: Thank you. It is my duty. Im proud of myself to pay the tax for our count
14、ry. Xiaofu: Yeah! The tax you paid is a share of our countrys economy, and you do a lot for Olympics of Beijing! Dabao: Lets do it together! . Its said that, Dont ask what your country can do for you but ask what you can do for your country. Just like me, sell Yangrouchuan, and pay the Tax for ten y
15、ears more. Xiaofu: You re the loveliest people in new century! Dabao: Thank you! And you re the loveliest tax collector in new era! X: Excuse me, and I have to go now. Bye-bye. D: A moment, are you free tomorrow evening? Could I have a dinner with you? Xiaofu: Well, may I have the company of my husband? Dabao: No, no, no problem. 6 oclock in the evening, Beichuanyuan, ok? Xiaofu: just a kidding. I have to go home now.(leaves) Dabao, See you tomorrow. Dabao: Hope to see you everyday. The End
