1、英文简历中不该出现的话致命的大错“Finished 8th in my high school graduating class of 10.“Qualifications: No education or experience.“I am relatively intelligent, obedient and loyal as a puppy.“My compensation should be at least equal to my age.“Reason for Leaving: It had to do with the IRS, FBI and SEC.“Fired becaus
2、e I fought for lower pay.“Size of employer: Very tall, probably over 65“ .“ “Please disregard the enclosed resume-it is terribly out of date.“Reason for Leaving: My boss said the end of the world is near.“Reason for Leaving: The owner gave new meaning to the word paranoia. I prefer to elaborate priv
3、ately.“打字错误与语法错误“Here are my qualifications for you to overlook.“Strengths: Ability to meet deadlines while maintaining composer.“I am a rabid typist.“Work History: Performed brain wave tests,1879-1981.“After receiving advice from several different angels, I have decided to pursue a new line of work
4、.“Accounting cleric.“As indicted, I have over five years of experience analyzing investments.“Suspected to graduate early next year.“Disposed of $2.5 billion in assets.“Proven ability to track down and correct erors.“Accomplishments: Oversight of entire department.“Am a perfectionist and rarely if i
5、f ever forget details.“Accomplishments: Completed 11 years of high school.“不应有的幽默“Note: Keep this resume on top of the stack. Use all others to heat your house.“Assisted in daily preparation of large quantities of consumable items in a fast-paced setting.“ (Translation: Short-order cook.)“But wait.t
6、heres more. You get all this business knowledge plus a grasp of marketing that is second nature.“I have an excellent track record, although I am not a horse.“My fortune cookie said, Your next interview will result in a job-and I like your company in particular.“Title: Another resume from the Profiles in Excellence series.“Also Known As: Mr. Productivity, Mr. Clever, Mr.Fix-it.“Trustworthy references available upon request-if I give them a few bucks.“Lets meet so you can ooh and ahh over my experience.“
